Forgotten

I often feel forgotten; by my friends, family, even acquaintances out in public. It’s almost like I fade into the background of life. Perhaps because of this, I long to be a priority to someone. I long to be important because I rarely feel that way.

As you know, I have my best friend and my boyfriend. They are my two biggest supporters and I rarely feel forgotten when I’m with them. Recently, my best friend just got a girlfriend and while I’m happy for him, I’m desperately scared that I’m going to be forgotten. Based on past personal experience, I’m usually forgotten about when a ‘friend’ finds a new significant other, so because of this I’m afraid I’m going to lose my best friend.

Only having two good friends, I long to make more and am scared of losing the ones that I have. They are very important to me and because of them, I feel stronger in my fight against my depression.

In a world where people just don’t pay attention, I don’t want to be one of those people lost in the crowd. I want to stand out but so often I feel like I just fade into the background, like I’m just another face in the crowd. Feeling like you’ve been forgotten is one of the worst feelings in the world because being forgotten leads to loneliness.

Perhaps this is one of the reasons that I have depression. I have been forgotten and ignored by so many people whom I once called ‘friends’. Maybe someday I won’t be one of the forgotten. Until then, I will continue to do what I can to stand out in a crowd. I will continue to fight against my disease and against the stigma that is attached to mental illness. Hopefully, my voice, my fight, and my non-profit will one day be heard. Maybe then, I will no longer be forgotten.

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